Friday, December 4, 2009

Stressors, Holidays, Sickness, Relatives and Numbness

Sigh, it has been a while that I have posted. Several things have happened mostly good, some scary,. I have been extremely busy at work with the H1n1 vaccination program. There are many nights we have had to stay late to accomodate all the people since everyone is getting scared that they will get this. Alot of people have already had this awful mess and don't even know it. Others get it and they are on respirators. The degree that this disease hits people is so varied that many doctors can't/don't/won't say its the swine flu. The other downside is that the testing for the virus is so expensive, they'd rather treat than find out definately if it is or isn't. Although Jeremy and I and the kids may have already contracted it at the beginning of the school year, I got them all vaccinated with the live virus nasal spray and when the injectable came out I also got it. Having Diabetes and Asthma I was not eligible to take the live virus nasal spray, so they (my family) got it easy. Somehow the thought of having to be in an ICU unit on a respirator didn't appeal to me. So many people are scared to take the vaccine. Scared they will get something else from it.

I get really worn down with people not wanting to take this vaccination or that vaccination because they feel it may cause autism. Even though all tests have proved otherwise and the People who did the MMR scandal in England have since recanted their findings. As an Autie, I was born way before thimeresol even existed. It runs in my family, it seems to run in Jeremy's as well. Vaccines do not cause my autism or anyone elses in my family.

Cancer is another thing that runs in my family. My father is battling his third year with NonHodgkins Lymphoma, my maternal uncle Sonny died with melanoma. My grandfather died of heart dsease and colon cancer. My children's father C died of lung cancer adenocarcinoma, and he never smoked or anything like that, he was just a brickmason and builder. So I am preocuppied with getting cancer screenings and watching out for my own health. I am also watching my own children carefully and trying my best to make sure they don't get sick from anything.

Health issues remain a concern for me and I recently had to have a CAT scan and an ultrasound. First they thought I had pain from a kidney stone, so they did a CAT scan, did not see any stones there, but they did find I have arthritis in my spine.... and a cyct on my liver which after having the ultasound is thought to be benign. I have to go back in May for another ultrasound just to check it. All the pain in my hips and back have been coming from the arthritis. Even the bursitis I have was caused by the arthritis. So now I have arthritis in the spine... great. Now what?

Holidays are around the corner. We just got through a family meal for Thanksgiving. Then my children spent a four day weekend with the family of their father and Jeremy and I had our own Thanksgiving meal to ourselves.

Saturday after Thanksgiving, Jeremy and I went to the tree farm in our area and got a lovely frasier fir which is now set up in our kitchen window. The children had to help me decorate it as I have not been well with a sinus infection and just haven't had much getup and go lately.
But that magical day for children is almost here and we are trying the best we can to prepare for it.

I wish there was ssome magic pill to take away the pain of the fibro and the arthritis and just geive me the energy to live a normal life. Instead, I am numb mentally, tired and in pain. What more can someone ask for?