Being an aspie has it limitations. Lots of which I am discovering just now. Seems the older I get, the worse some things have become. The things I was able to deal with as a younger person have become more difficult. I am more cranky. I meltdown much more easily. What I haven't decided is that is it because I know now that I am aspie? Or is it because I just don't care anymore because i know? Is this now my excuse? Or is this my road to self destruction?
Friday, December 15, 2006
Numbed as usual
Today, I am numb, I woke exhausted, after waking every hour. I came home yesterday and so overloaded that I fell asleep on the sofa, with no idea what was happening around me and it was only 8:45. I woke with a start to hear my middle child humming in her room and my son playing on my computer. I was not sure of the time, and started yelling what were they doing awake so late, as I felt as if I had slept for hours. It was only 10:30pm.
So when I awoke each hour I was afraid I was late to work. I haven't needed an alarm clock since October. I'm not sleeping enough.
I got into work, and people were saying things that I just couldn't seem to understand. It was if they spoke another language or my comprehension just had taken leave of my head. I didn't understand. They were trying to joke with me or say things with double meanings which usually I get easily and just was fogged. I just could only stare.
I just couldn't get it.
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2 comments:
you did better than myself. i couldn't even make it to work today.
Hope you start to feel better. I even have to work today. And the cycle is viciously repeating.
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