Numbed and Emotionless,
childlike,
Yet too old.
too alone,
too scared.
Too tired to stay awake,
but too scared to sleep.
Too battered to move,
Too nervous to sit still.
One part of the mind racing at light speed,
the other desperately trying to close my eyes.
One not wanting to see the thoughts racing through my head,
The other too busy to ignore them.
One urging to write it all down before it goes away,
the other, sit still, relax, forget, rest....
Wanting the pressure of touch,
yet shunning all other sensations of feeling.
Wanting soft and silky touch of clothing,
and moving my toes in itchy shoes.
My eyes still sticky with sleep,
and my mind racing on the fuel of caffiene.
I want to go,
but have to stay put.
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